From my previous blogs you can clearly see that Riski has a plan for climate change and has begun to turn around the economy …. And has resolved the boat people problem.

So now he is turning his super-imaginative mind to the bloated, bureaucratic, sclerotic NHS. All attempts to reform the system have failed and the managers just ask for more money. Now half the staff are on strike for higher pay and waiting lists for treatment get longer and longer. 7,000,000 and counting.

Some clown in the Department of Illhealth, Stephen Barkingmad – Minister-for-the-moment, came up with the idea of cards in cigarette packets with messages like “It is not woke to smoke” and “ smoke makes you broke” or may be “Smoking adds to global warming”. Somehow Riski didn’t think that would work. People wold just buy more cigarettes to collect the cards, like they did with film stars and footballers in the olden days.

At the moment we are just about the fattest nation on earth. So Riski had a better idea … EXERCISE . A National plan to get us all fitter.

Riski has declared that next week will be “BRISKI MARATHON WEEK”. Between the hours of 8am and 9am every day except Sunday, everybody will be asked to come out and walk at least 4 miles. That will almost add up to a marathon in a week. All traffic will have to stop to allow people to get out of their vehicles and walk. This will improve Britains carbon footprint by an estimated 5% in one small step for mankind and womankind and LGBTQ+kind.

Participation will be entirely voluntary, but any one who does not take part will go to the back of the NHS waiting list should they need any health services. Children under two years will be able to travel in push chairs. Other malingers can be exempted provided they have a Doctors note, although there is a two year waiting list for GP appointments.

The tried and tested Covid track and trace system will identify people who attempt to cheat and they will be rounded up and put on treadmills in public parks and have to walk double miles. The treadmills will generate electricity and will be linked to the National Grid. Another 500,000 kilowatts every week! Ka-ching.

After a week Riski’s great idea will be independently evaluated by Riski’s best friends and anticipating that it will be a great success, it will be extended to BRISKI MARATHON YEAR !

The office of national statistics has estimated that by the end of 2024, conveniently before the General Election, the UK population will have lost 65,000,000 stones in weight; 25,000,000 inches around the National waist and generated enough power to stop drilling more oil wells in the North Sea, which should shut up the Just Stop Oil protesters.

🤡JOB DONE🤡