GrumbleSmiles

Every politician aspires to be Prime Minister one day. So in this period of uncertainty, why not let them all have a go?

🤡PRIME MINISTER FOR ONE DAY🤡

There are 402 Labour MP’s, so in just over 13 months they could all have a shot at it. Then after this ‘trial’ we could appoint a winner from the one who had achieved the most in their day at the top.

Each one would have to pick an idea and get it through a vote in the House of Commons. The key rule would be that their proposal can’t cost anything. Saving money would be a big bonus.

It’s more than likely that many of the proposals would not get through and that little would be achieved in this trial year. So no real change at all.

But you never know. A genius hidden on the back benches may come up with a radical idea that no-one had been bold enough to suggest like :-

• Switching to Parliament working one day a week and the rest of the time MP’s Working From Home.
• Selling off all the Government’s chauffeur driven limousines, issue MP’s with bus passes since they are so keen on public transport.
• Strapping solar panels on the backs of all MP’s to give them more power.
• Moving the retirement age to 100, thereby saving on the state pension and the winter fuel allowance.
• Shortening school terms to only 4 weeks, so that our hard-working teachers can have more time off.
• Making junior doctors automatically into senior doctors and giving them £100,000 a year providing they treat some patients.
• Nationalising everything without compensation and locking up the previous owners / shareholders / profiteers.
• Privatise the NHS and sell off all the hospitals to pay down the National Debt.
• Sell all Government buildings now that all civil servants are Working from Home.
• Make a virtue of potholes. Drill baby drill all potholes down to I mile deep to see if we can find oil / gas / rare earth minerals. Funded with Pothole Bonds.
• Freeze all civil servants pay until 2030 and remove ‘London weighting allowances‘ for those working from home. This will probably cause them all to strike, which will save even more money. And we probably won’t notice any reduction in productivity.

🤡NOT A BAD START🤡

“Don’t cast a clout ‘till May is out” is something I can remember from my childhood days. The word “clout” means clothing.

I must admit that my thermal vest, my fleece lined shirt and my woolly jumper are already making it a bit hot in April. I will probably be cooked alive if I have to wear them throughout the month of May.

Obviously nobody anticipated the onset of global warming when these proverbs were first used.

“Be a hero, go for nett zero”

A word I’d never come across a few years ago, but now seems an ever present description of our current state.

Confused, bewildered, perplexed are all more readily understood alternative descriptions.

Life and the world seemed simpler in years past. Now with instant worldwide communications you can be aware of much more, but that doesn’t necessarily aide understanding. Which leads to DISCOMBOBULATION.

I wrote about bewilderment in April 2010 (click on the Archive box to find the post) which was a blog about lack of a strategic sociSince then the problems of the ageing population have increased significantly but there has only been a faltering response. The retirement age has been put back and equalised for men and women, but we are still arguing about winter fuel payments and the tripple-lock. The future funding of social care is still unresolved.

That is just one BEWILDERING issue. There are many more whose resolution continues to CONFUSE and PERPLEX us :-

• Wars in several parts of the world.
• The challenge of Climate change and nett zero.
• How to curb the rising cost of living.
• What impact will AI have on jobs.
• The never ending saga of immigration.

I could go on ……….but without solutions it all adds up to

DISCOMBOBULATION

Perhaps we should have a Minister for bewilderment. Or a perplexed Parliamentary Committee. Or a Lord of Confusion.

Or how about a DISCOMBOBULATED Prime Minister?

🤡MAYBE WE HAVE ALL OF THEM ALREADY🤡