This is a Last Laugh Looney Party attempt to resolve some of the big issues in these New Muddled Ages. Based on the idea that desperate times need desperate measures.
We certainly don’t want a war to force us to face up to reality, but neither do we need a revolution. Our politicians have failed us so far, so maybe the LLLP introduce some fresh thoughts based on previous ideas that have fallen on deaf ears.
A critical precursor to the LLLP proposals is that the Government be put on a war-time footing to enable actions to be expedited without delay. This should clear obstructive lawyers and civil service to one side.
Let’s start with IMMIGRATION. Attempts to turn back the tide have been as effective as King Canute. So why not swim with the incoming tide and welcome all immigrants. With conditions.
- A visa fee of £5,000 payable on arrival in the UK. That will immediately stop the rubber boats crossing the channel.
- Followed by a £100,000 CLAP – Citizen Loan Apprenticeship Plan, which they must pay back within 10 years; either in vouchers, or in working for the Government. Similar to the student loan scheme, it can pay toward their new lifestyle in the UK, by covering their rental and healthcare costs. The vouchers cannot be spent on anything else.
- In return they will get accommodation and free health care.
- They will have to use the vouchers to pay for their accommodation, which will be in tents, or caravans, or cheap hotels, or b&b’s, or even 5 star hotels. Whatever they can afford.
- Those requiring health care immediately must pay cash up front or they will be sent to Rwanda’s excellent hospitals. For all other health care they must join the back of the NHS queue.
- On arrival in the UK their skills will be assessed by the new ASS – Apprentice Skills Secretary – Smiling Nigel. He will greet them with a pint of beer and fish & chip meal and a packet of jammy dodgers; to get them into the English culture.
- They will then be placed in a Government priority job, such as fruit picking for victory; or trench digging for the new green electricity grid; or planting wild flowers to create habitats for great crested newts and pine martins and house martins and every other kind of martins.
With this new open door policy the population of the UK is expected to increase by 2,000,000 a year. Or maybe even more!
The next post will look at where they might work and where they can be located.
GrumbleSmiles 
Good Lord! the LONG Lost LOONIE Party? WHO are they? do we need reminding of them?
LLLP What are their ‘VIRTUES’? WELL as far as I can read,, family loyalty, looking after one and other; Then lots of common sense. and then respect and consideration for each other, Joining hands and making agreement with each other for the common good of the UK Nation.
Respecting, religion, colour, and political ideals, and believing that for us all, and the common good that we can with hope look forward to our elected politicians, maiking our ideals and dreams come true, without the resort to violence and distruptive behaviour?
We have all a lot to learn the prisons/jails are full, convicted persons being released prior before their end of sentence, immigration policy for human rights, and not just misplaced, or wrongful use of the title ‘A immigrant; but person’s’ who will benefit from the ideals and help to provide the welfare, for those less well off than them selves with respect to freedom and well being. WE need to, all of us respect and care for one and other.
Embolden our children and the next UK Nations generations to bring a free world, with free thoughts: BUT COLLECTIVE ACTIONS of what IS GOOD FOR US ALL as individual CITIZENS!!! with compassion and respect for each other.
LONG LIVE a democracy, and the Last Last LOONIE Party!!!!
atisho! atisho! we all fall down, In our retirement village of EXTRACARE, we are not queuing, or expectant of common sense from the alleged tabled Budget, but for CORVID and FLU Jabs, they are looking after us? while the politicians ‘RABBIT ON’ on the sbjects of what they may do for us all.
THE Last Laugh LOONIE Party, are in the shadows, wondering were we go from here, preventing our coughs and sneezes, and maybe adverse comment being showered upon the new Prime Minister, who maybe trying to see where his team ARSENAL, may wind up in the league, ?? Will they be a leader top of their league like HIM, or just a name for the media to quote, and discuss the finer points, of what a good team should be, with a competant manager. Never mind the coffees at half time to his personal box, which at Arsenal, should bring him comfort and warm his heart, as he looks down on his fellow supporters and the opposition supporters shouting and bawling in the stand: FOR WHAT I May ASK??? Maybe the LLLP have an idea? but then that would be based upon common sense, and respect for the skills of 22 good players, playing their hearts out, for each of their respective supporters, but most off all- deep appriciation of the game of FOOTBALL, and how more than one person is involved, but under a good leader, not a spectator???