SCRAP Step 27- All Tied Up

Back in October last year I started to write about de-cluttering and one of my first references was to my ties.  (Look up “Clutterhead” in the Archive for October 2010 to see the post ).     My attachment to my many ties was tied up in the memories they brought back.      As a result, I didn’t actually throw away any of my beloved ties, rather, I just tidied them up and put them on a shiny stainless steel rail back in my wardrobe.    Mind you they were now arranged in rainbow order, which at least made me feel like I had achieved something.

Unfortunately, the stainless steel hanging rail proved to be a little too slippery and many of my ties were regularly found in a tangled heap on the floor.   Alas, five months later and the rainbow order has become a spagetti soup sort of order and makes finding the right tie like a search for a needle in a haystack.

Now for a bit of mental arithmetic :-

  • I have about 90 ties in all;
  • These days I mainly wear them for special occasions — lunches or dinners in the winter —- and then weddings —- or funerals;
  • That amounts to about 10 ties have I worn in the last twelve months ;
  • At that rate I have enough ties to last me for the next 9 years even if I never wear the same tie again.

  • Or if I were to go mad and use them all in a year, I could gate crash loads of weddings and get myself into 90 wedding photographs with a different tie for each occasion.
  • Or I could pay my respects at 100’s of funerals.   Nobody knows everybody at a funeral and you only need one black tie.
  • Finally as a last hurragh, I could wear a tie to 90 different swanky restaurants and leave a signed tie as a tip for the waiter.     In the confusion, he might think I am famous and if I am quick leaving I might get away without paying .

My ties deserve a fitting end.

Has anybody got any better ideas ?

There will be a copy of Walt Hopkins and George Simons’ book — “Seven Ways to Lighten Your Life Before You Kick the Bucket” — for the best ideas on de-cluttering.

 

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3 Responses to SCRAP Step 27- All Tied Up

  1. Mo Graham says:

    You could substitute Tilly the Cockerpoo’s lead for a different tie every so often to use on your daily walks with her. Or you could join them all together with tight knots and leave this long line of ties curled up under the bed to be used in an emergency – such as a fire – so we could abseil to safety out of the bedroom window.

    Alternatively, you could stop fretting about how many ties you have and start worrying about more important things – like what our family’s stance on the Trump administration should be for instance, or whether we should exchange our diesel cars for petrol driven alternatives…..

    Failing all that, just hang them back up neatly in your wardrobe and enjoy wearing a different tie each time we go out 😘

  2. Gillian J Farmer says:

    Hi John,
    May I suggest either putting them all in a carry bag and send to the Village Sewing Club (Brenda Beesley) for patchwork quilting or the best Idea throw them all in the “Wheelie Bin” and start again because they are probably out of fashion anyway. PLEASE don’t let Mo read this. G&Tx

  3. davidwfreeman237 says:

    Ties
    Oh Dear! Oh Dear!, all these ties? Mo has delivered you from evil; as the prayer goes with some interesting solutions. Whether you agree or not is a different matter.
    Dear Jon I look into my mirror, and I see you as my Tiger! Bursting onto the stage or world, fit and strong ready to do justice? Today it is the humble tie.
    As the tiger I see you in shorts, socks flip flops, a knotted hankie, and a shirt of dazzling colour un buttoned to the waist, showing off ones hairy chest and those ‘Pecks’?
    If this image frightens one, then I drift more into a relaxed mode, still the open shirt/hairy chest, and maybe a ‘bay-window’ then one has too thing more laterally , and maybe think of ‘Compo’ in last of the summer wine, with shorts/trousers/ draws held up by ties tied around the waist and passed through the various belt loops? [do not forget the wellies-green designer types, with buckles!]
    Now then that is one image, now I have another, with a more wistful use of the ties? The image so far is an open shirt to the waist, hairy chest and ‘pecks’ to die for; imaging one travels around the world, the sun, the beach, that dreamy lagoon by the sea {Hawaii?] and all those girls! One could with the attire of the open necked shirt to the waist (Brightly coloured), sting a made up waist band of ties, and then Tie many a tie to this waist band dangling down to ones knee cap, as if they were blades of tropical grass, bare feet, all this on one front porch in the ‘rocker’ while one dreams and downs ones favourite refreshment, and has the record player playing that wonderful Hawaiian guitar music which one could dance too. What all you old cronies would say from the various associations, may say about the disregard, and unsympathetic use of their ties would be and is anybody’s guess?
    As a matter of interest I would feel undressed to join you on the porch for that dance as I have only 3 ties One for Sunday; one for a weekday, and one for funerals.

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