LLLP and Trump

Once again the Last Laugh Looney Party has been brought back to assist Prime Minister, Mrs Maynever.     This time it was at the world leaders summit ——- the World Economic Forum at the Swiss luxury resort of Davos.     Mrs Maynever thought she might need some creative LLLP ideas to put to President Trump to help secure a better trade deal with the USA.

The first step in LLLP negotiations was to get a copy of Mr Trump’s book ‘The Art of the Deal’.    Then tell him how he must be a very clever man to become President with no political experience, just a lot of money.    Oh and his writing style was excellent, when you consider all he had written before was a few tweets.     Finally we had a special gift to reflect our special                                                         relationship ——  a years supply of hair spray.

Mr Trump seemed very flattered by all this adulation.  So then we heaped on some more  to celebrate the fact that his mother came from this country, so he was practically a British citizen.      Mrs Maynever, wishing to ingratiate herself as his very best friend, offered him —— Scotland, —— which had always been a bit of a problem for her party.

In one fell swoop the LLLP had got rid of all those caber tossing, whiskey drinking, argumentative bravehearts —— and re-secured a majority in the House of Commons, now that the SNP members of parliament would be leaving to take up a place in Washington.

President Trump couldn’t believe his good luck.   He would make Scotland the golfing capital of the free world, because everyone knows he is a great golfer, probably the best golfing President there has ever been.

Without hesitation he offered Mrs Maynowandagain a brand new better, much much better trade agreement, than any one else had got in the past.     Britain would be able to buy lots more American fighter jets for its aircraft carriers that didn’t have any and also a heap of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream.

In return the USA would pay all the back tax on tea owed to Britain since the Boston Tea Party in 1773.    In recognition of their help in the negotiations, the President offered Hawaii to the LLLP to add to their Island Republic.

On his way home, the President reflected on the excellent deal he had negotiated.    Hawaii was always bit too close to North Korea for his liking and they voted for the Democrats, so it was a good off-load before his second term election.     Scotland  could be the new 51st state, and would be an ideal location for some more nuclear missiles pointed at Russia or anyone else really.

Then he thought about all the extra golf courses the Trump Organisation could build.    He could implement his hew revolutionary golf concept.    No 18th hole, instead a brand new 50 storey luxury world class Trump hotel.   Never mind all those silly rules about over development in National Parks, this would be a new land of opportunity in America’s new 51st State.

Later, when the dust has settled, he might also drop the 13th hole, because who likes unlucky 13.   That would make room for a brand new world class Trump casino.     Everybody knows 16 hole golf courses are better than 18, because President Trump, who is probably the best golfing President in the world, says so.

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2 Responses to LLLP and Trump

  1. A ‘’Whoose’’
    ‘’Eureka?’’ we are here again the ‘Last Laugh Loonet Party’ [LLLP]! with a consensus of strong opinions; But alas no leader.
    The image portrayed on the electioneering poster for the troops, and footsoldiers is of a man in a skirt? What a shame the Rt. Honourable Mrs May Prime Minister is more often than not paraded in trousers? As an oldie, and avid voter of the LLLP I am confused, and whom do I vote for? Even Mr Trump looks like a good bet.
    Alas though Mr Trump is proposing/alleging Scotland as a saviour nation, and all that means? Lots of ‘Clubs’ to join, and ‘’More balls to talk about’’?
    God help the LLLP, we may yet save the western world ( Well Isles, at Least), and initiate some deep thoughts into to-days political classes and dogma within the UK and Great Britain, and maybe the U.S.A?
    I see the state of Hawaii is being alienated, sold off to some third world nation? A suggestion is Great Britain? However maybe our new naval aircraft carriers may have to fly ’kites’, with propaganda messages, and some ‘’drones’ [nested bees] who’s only purpose in life is to impregnate the queen bee by a fly out/past and then the conquering drone like the rest of his kind buzz around and die off!
    The LLLP may second a good trade deal UK/USA: however we still have our European neighbours to think about?
    I may say we should vote for the LLLP, Men in Skirts, and Women in trousers, and join a lot of ‘Clubs’ to play with and yet talk and think a ‘’lot of balls’’ and vote if you say yes for Elvis Presley, and a ‘Blue Hawaii’, so that Barrack Mambo still has a seat in the Senate! Or at last has somewhere to eat and enjoy Ben and Terry’s ‘’Ice Cream. While in the meantime Thomas Cook-Thompson with their Germanic masters have a destination for holiday makers to enjoy a destination, abroad, that provides sun, sand, and ladies/nubile girls in grass skirts, and lots of steel guitar/zither music to calm the soul?
    Maybe I have let the ‘Mormons in but alas that is another day, and another story??
    PS whose the ‘whoose’ You or me???

  2. spelling dear reader I beg your pardon.
    Firstly [Western Isles] Line 9 and
    secondly Barrack Obama line 21.

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