This is the final broadcast by Bodj on his manifesto for a brighter future. If you have been tuning into Bodj’s earlier broadcasts you will recall that he has convincingly demonstrated his breakthrough thinking on keeping us all safe, healthy and well educated. The last programme showed how Bodj will lead the world on climate change.
The final chapter of the manifesto will deal with the all pervading subject of technology.
This is Bodj’s script for tonight :-
“I coined the word “ MOONSHOT” to describe my aspiration for the Test, Track and Trace system. And we know how well that went!
Now we need a galaxy conquering “SUNSHOT” to get our world beating, BREXIT free, economy going again. My previous Chancellor, Rushi Havesnomemoney, got us into £trillions of debt. I firmly believe technology holds the golden key to a brighter future.
As a result of Coronapop, I have closed down all the shops and in future you can get everything you need from the worlds one-stop shop Amazon. They will only accept on-line orders and payments. No money will change hands so you won’t have to wash your hancs fifty times a day. Delivery will be by drone so you will not need to see or speak to a real person. Amazon have generously agreed to pay £1 a year in taxes, for the exclusive rites to provide this service throughout the UK. Except, that is for Scotland, where delivery will be by very slow bicycle, until they agree to stop banging on about independence.
Turning to health, I am delighted to announce that technology has once again saved the day. Our Nightingale hospitals will replace all existing NHS hospitals and all operations will be carried out by Amazon robots under the close, but remote supervision of Matt Handcockup, with his laptop computer. Matt has been promoted to Surgeon General, after his heroics with Coronapop.
Since our GP’s all disappeared during the Coronapop crisis I have decided to do without them in future and use the excellent 111 phone service instead. When you eventually get through to the automatic exchange, you will be asked to type in your symptoms and an Amazon robot will tell you what’s wrong with you. The Amazon pharmacy will then deliver your pills in whatever time slot they have available.
Finally, I must cover education, because children are our future and especially now they have the vote ! Schools and teachers and most of all exams were all a bit of a pain, even at Eaton. We want our children to be happy and not have to suffer a mentally stressful education. So I propose to learn from the Coronapop close down and close schools and universities for good. Education will be delivered remotely in Amazon YouTube videos, supported by the Amazon Education Helpline. And it is all free !, although there will be frequent adverts.”
THAT’S ALL FOLKS !